Urgent Update From CHEM0100
By J. Kaiserman '23 Dear students, As you may know, Professor Schwann resigned from the University this morning. I realize that this...
The Archive
Here, you can find (almost) all of our published pieces, cartoons, and art from past issues and issues to come sorted by issue and by author. Enjoy!
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The Quarantini and Other Cocktails for the Early Days of the COVID-19 Pandemic
By O. Rousseau ‘21 The Quarantini Shaken or stir-crazy 1 part gin 1 part vermouth Served in a 6ft tall glass The “We’re All...
Helpful Phrases for Patiently Communicating the Experience of Being on Crutches
By J. Ecker MAT ‘21 Um excuse me, the door isn’t going to open itself. Yep, a week later and it’s still broken. Shocking, I know. You’re...
The Advice Column of His Lordship the Duke of Lustonshire
By O. Ryan '23 Note: All serf’s writings transcribed by members of the manor’s monastery Dearest His Lordship, My son hath declared a...
CNN Anchor John King’s Election Coverage Sign-Ons
By D. Herrnstadt '24 10/3, 7:00 p.m.: I’m John King with CNN, and this is the Race to 270. 10/3, 7:30 p.m.: I’m John King with CNN, and...
16 Jokes About Secretary of the Treasury Steve Mnuchin
By J. Marglous '21 Steve Mnuchin always looks a little uncomfortable, like he stepped in gum or accidentally smelled a poor person. Steve...
Modern Feminism
By D. Herrnstadt '24 Raising a Strong Young Woman in the 21st century is the hardest, most rewarding job in the world. I’m a single...
Study Titles Pending Departmental Review
By O. Rousseau '21 You Can Dance, You Can Jive, Halving the Time of Your Life: Sobering Evidence from Liver Damage Testing in 18-25...
Dear Reader
By J. Marglous '21 Dear Reader, It is with heavy hearts that we inform you of the passing of one of our longtime contributors, Benjamin...
The Ending to The Great Gatsby By the Guy Who Directed John Wick (T.E.T.T.G.G.B.T.G.W.D.J.W.)
By R. Poisson '22 EXT. GATSBY’S POOL - DAY GATSBY emerges from the water and makes his way up the pool ladder. Off camera, a phone rings....
Meet My Camper, Philip Roth
By D. Rebman '22 In the dry, American summer of 1946 I worked as a summer camp counselor in Newark, New Jersey. My little place of work...
